Saturday, December 8, 2007

A Badge Encounter of the Bathroom Kind

Since it was that time of the morning when I needed to do some reverse fishing, I entered the men's room at work looking for an empty stall among the three provided. Usually I try to follow the unwritten "every other stall" rule but today there was someone in the center stall so I had to skip to my loo in the adjoining handicap stall.

Selecting the handicap stall is usually my preference anyway since being a big guy it provides more room around the toilet; allowing me to CTL ALT DEL my cache with less of a chance that a toe tapping senator with a wide stance will interrupt me dropping the Brown family off at the neighborhood pool.

Descending onto the launch pad I glanced around hoping not to see shoes or hands frantically waving secret and desperate signals under the stall divider. Instead I see a face--employee T***** A****
ID # 1*****staring up at me. I guess he had clipped his security badge to his belt and as his pants fell towards his ankles it caused his photo ID badge to dangle intrusively under the divider to stare up at me.

What should I do? Drop a piece of toilet paper and cover Employee ID # 1*****'s laminated smile? Hand my badge down to confront his badge and firmly say "No!" Leave and return later to see a man about a horse?

Feeling that I really needed to complete my test of the plumbing NOW, I finished my prairie doggin' before the fiber-challenged employee T***** A**** did and I cast my vote and left.

When I saw employee ID #1***** later in the hallway I had trouble making eye contact. Does he know? Does he know I know what his badge knows?

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